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George Carlin
Gun Enthusiasts

Here are some more people with missing chromosomes who oughta be thrown screaming from a helicopter:
Gun enthusiasts. Yanno? Oh yeah. "I'm a gun enthusiast." Oh yeah? Well, I'm a blowjob enthusiast. Wanna see me shoot?
Cock this, and I'll discharge a load for ya.

And I'm not against guns. I'm not one of those mindless Hollywood cocksuckers. I'm not against guns, I'm not against bullets. I'm not even against people shooting each other. Shit, shooting somebody is part of the American dream. I don't care who it is; parents, teachers, kids. Fuck 'em. Let 'em get shot. Doesn't bother me.

But, speaking of mindless Hollywood cocksuckers. Before Charlton Heston became president of these dickless lunatics in the N.R.A., they had a different guy. He's still one of their major spokesmen. His name is Wayne LaPierre. What kind of a name for a gun nut is Wayne LaPierre? Doesn't it sound a little fruity to you? "Hi, I'm Wayne, I'm a gun person. Bang, bang!". You know what this prick's name oughta be? Biff Webster. Spud Crowley. A man's name. Chuck Steak.