Met this fine young thing at the local Circle K
She made a date for a half past eight and I said, "What the hey?"
So I journeyed to her crib and I let myself inside
That chick was slouched down on the couch, I think her brain was fried
Couldn't figure it out, she wouldn't even look at me
Then I saw her eyes, she was hypnotized, cold glued to her TV
"Hey, what's your problem, baby doll, let's have a little fling"
She said, "Hey, you fool, now just be cool
I'm watchin' that Gilligan's Isle thing"

Isle thing
Isle thing

Watchin' all night, musta been a marathon
I was bummin', those shows kept comin', here's what was goin' on
These castaways were stranded on this island out at sea
One of 'em called Gilligan, said, "Let's name it after me"
He'd mess up every rescue, man, that first mate was illin'
If I was one of those castaways, I think I'd probably kill him
Just about that time, telephone began to ring
She said, "Just let it, my machine'll get it
We're watchin' the Gilligan's Isle thing"

Isle thing
She loves that Gilligan's Isle thing
Isle thing
Please, baby, baby, please
I like the professor, he always saved their butts
He could build a nuclear reactor from a couple of coconuts
She said, "That guy's a genius," I shook my head and laughed
I said, "If he's so fly, then tell me why he couldn't build a lousy raft?"
And while we're on the subject, I'll tell you one thing for sure
Those homeboys brought an awful lot for just a three hour tour
Then her mom came in the room, it was kind of embarrassing
She said, "Hey, you two, I was once like you
And I loved that Gilligan's Isle thing"

Isle thing
She'd watch that Gilligan's Isle thing
Please, baby, baby, please

Skipper's in a hammock, he's looking kinda fat
He'd throw a fit and then he'd hit old Gilligan with his hat
Mrs. Howell got it goin' on, but Mr. Howell was meaner
Ginger and Mary Anne could've used some funky cold medina
I was really diggin' this show, I didn't know what to do
It kinda looked like I was hooked, now I'm an addict too
I know each episode by heart, now I'm the rerun king
And on every date we both stay up late
And we watch the Gilligan's Isle thing

Isle thing
Hasta la vista, little buddy
Gilligan's Isle thing