Tapping time with one good finger
I got this girlfriend and she's a swinger
We make plans and then we head out
To San Bernardino

We get gas at the local P & M
Buy a Coke in a can made of tin
We drink fast because we're headed out west
To San Bernardino

And we shall miss Carolina
And the east coast as opposed to the west
We won't shed any tears though
Nor even be sad because we know
The western desert is the best

I filled a bag with cigarettes and apple wine
We'll hit the road again at ten minutes to nine
Me and this girl, I think she's pregnant
And we're headed to San Bernardino

And then when we hit Texas
We'll stop in Amarillo for a bite to eat
We'll stop on over in Dallas
And visit my friend, but we can't stay for more than a week
I've got the south in my veins but California in my mouth
And that's the simple reason why I'm leaving the south
Me and this girl and she's so foxy
And we're heading to San Bernardino

Well, that was close we crossed the Tennessee state border
They would've locked us up by the sheriff's order
Yes, we're freaks, but they can't touch us out west
In San Bernardino

And we shall miss Carolina
And the east coast as opposed to the west
We won't shed any tears though
Nor even be sad because we know
The western desert is the best

I filled a bag with cigarettes and apple wine
We'll hit the road again at ten minutes to nine
Me and this girl, she's so foxy
And we're headed to San Bernardino