Jon Lajoie
Everyday Normal Crew
Hey yo! Fuck NWA (Get the fuck out of here)
Fuck G Unit (fuck that shit)
Fuck D12 (motherfucker!)
Get the fuck out of the way (fuck you bitch!)
Normal motherfucking crew (motherfucker!)
Everyday normal crew (what what what what!)

We just a regular everyday normal crew
You can fuck with us, ’cause we won’t fuck with you
We just a regular everyday normal crew
Once a month we get drunk and watch Terminator 2
We just a regular everyday normal crew
If you’re hot, bitches we’re too shy to talk to you
We just a regular everyday normal crew
And we enjoy spending time with our families

This is my bro J-A to the S-O-N yo
The best at Mike Tyson’s Punch Out on Nintendo
From Glass Joe to Macho Man, he fucks shit up
Then Tyson goes down with a star upper-cut
And he’s also pretty good at Super Mario 3
But he doesn’t use the flutes cause he doesn’t like cheats
Like the Contra code that he really doesn’t like
Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right
Then B, A, B, A, Select, Start you got 30 lives
He says that shit’s for pussies who don’t know how to fight
Yo this my man Chi, better known as cheese bread
We call him that ’cause every time he gets out of bed
He puts 5 slices of cheese on 5 slices of bread
Microwaves that shit, eats it, then goes back to bed
Sleeps 12 hours a day and he doesn’t like Asian food
That’s right bitches, he doesn’t like Asian food
He doesn’t like the taste of soy sauce
Personally I love that shit but he does not

Yo Ben is my friend that owns every DVD
From Goonies to Time Cop to Beverly Hills Cop 3
Dark Knight, First Knight, A Knight’s Tale, and Knight Rider
He even owns the motherfucking movie Street Fighter
I borrow them from him I never pay to rent a movie
As long as I take care of the box and don’t scratch the DVD
Cause last week I borrowed City Slickers and it got scratched
I was hoping that he wouldn’t notice when I brought it back
But he did and he was pissed so I apologized to him
And he forgave me and I asked him if I could borrow the movie Twins
He was reluctant to do so, but he knows I love DeVito
With Schwarzenegger, that’s a motherfucking comedic duo!

We just a regular everyday normal crew
We own our tickets to Alanis Morissette in June
We just a regular everyday normal crew
We bust gats and cadillacs in Grand Theft Auto 2
We just a regular everyday normal crew
No party is a party without a Phil Collins tune
We just a regular everyday normal crew
And when one of us gets a haircut we make fun of them
Yo this is D and he’s a big fucking wrestling fan
Monday Night Raw, Smackdown, and all the shit from the past
Like Macho Man Randy Savage and Hulkamania
Every year he travels to attend WrestleMania
It may come as no surprise that he’s never had sex
But it doesn’t bother him ’cause he has the internet
He jerks off to freaky shit like 2 Girls 1 Cup
He’s fucked up, I tried watching it, I fucking threw up

This my n***a KC (What the fuck did you just call me?)
Sorry...I’ll say friend
This is my friend KC the only black friend in the crew
Not because we’re racist every race is welcome in the group
Truthfully he’s a friend of a friend, I don’t know him that well
But not because he’s black, my favorite actors are Denzel
And Samuel L. Jackson, I also like Bill Paxton
But not because he’s white, but because of his acting

This is my friend Cleo, she really likes the Beatles
Her favorite is McCartney and her least favorite is Ringo
A year ago I asked her to go on a date with me she said no
She said she’d rather just be friends, I started crying and ran home
And since then we rarely make eye contact when we speak
Which is awkward ’cause we all hang out at least two times a week

Finally, I ain’t me without my best friend Steve
He’s got my motherfuckin’ back although he’s weaker than me
He’ll probably have a heart attack sometime soon
But until then he’s my top gun like fucking Tom Cruise!
[Jon Lajoie:] Say it
[Steve:] Nah
[Jon Lajoie:] Say it, c’mon say it
[Steve:] Nah
[Steve:] You want some of this bitch?! Money! Have a nice day bitch!

If you play organized sports say, “Hell yeah.”
If you watch 24 say, “Hell yeah.”
If the only ass you see is in porn say, “Hell yeah.”
If you eat chocolate when you’re bored say, “Hell yeah.”

I eat chocolate, a lot...when I’m bored. Um, I should stop though...my metabolism is slowing down. I also like pie...cherry and, uh...rhubarb

We just a regular everyday normal crew
The joke’s getting old, I fucking agree with you
We just a regular everyday normal crew
I'm just repeating the same shit from Normal Guy 1 and 2
We just a regular everyday normal crew
What a twist, in this one, I'm rapping about my friends too
We just a regular everyday normal crew
I think this cow’s been milked dry...motherfucker!

[Steve:] You want some of this bitch? You’ll never get it...it’s gonna go right in my asshole