[Verse 1: Liam Fray]
She lured me in with her city centre apartment, a dry wry smile
And the way she approached our language
With such precision and ease
I stood enchanted at the frame of the door
She said "Get in you berk, put your coat on the floor, get into that kitchen and start chopping up those E's, please"

[Chorus: Liam Fray]
But, I never wanted to
Didn't know what to do
She was the one that suggested
She practically molested me

[Verse 2: Liam Fray]
Course that's what your friends would say
They never liked me anyway
I sat down, I did not try and hold her hand
Never-mind, try and get in her sack
Should've seen her face when I said, "Darling, no"
Didn't think she was ever gonna, ever let me go
The cheeky bitch, even asked for her lighter back

[Chorus: Liam Fray]
But, I never wanted to
Didn't know what to do
She was the one that suggested
She practically molested me
[Instrumental Break: The Courteeners]

[Chorus: Liam Fray]
I never wanted to
Didn't know what to do
She was the one that suggested
She practically molested me