[Intro skit]
Hey everyone, Anthony Fantano here, internet's busiest music nerd. I hope everybody's doing well. Um, listen, uh, you guys know if you've been watching me for a long time and watching me since the beginning, um, I kinda got my start out on YouTube doing freestyles, doing a lot of lyrical rhymes. Um, and, uh, you know, then from there I obviously went on to do music reviews and stuff like that and that's, you know, that's currently what I'm happy doing. Uh, but I feel like there's a lot of people who follow the channel since then, I had a very small following at the time, um, who have joined the channel since then and th-they don't know the history and they're like, "Why-why are you review rap music? What do you know about rap music? You don't know nothin' about the rap music, you never heard the rap music before." And it's like, uh, yeah, I mean I've heard at least three rap albums over the course of, uh, my lifetime, and, um, I'm a really good rapper, too. What more does one need to be listening to and commenting on rap music? I don't, I mean that's, that's the bare minimum for me. Um, so I'm about to come on here and I'm gonna spit this freestyle that I wrote that I think is really good, um, and, uh, I'm basically gonna blow you guys away, y'know, is essentially what's gonna fucking happen. So, um, get ready to shut the fuck up 'cause I'm looking forward to seeing all y'all do that. Uh, get ready to shut up, sit down, and take some notes, and never say anything bad about me ever again. God, the thought of you guys like, y'know, your jaw is dropping and you suffering and crying like, "I was wrong, I was wrong!" just like brings me so much joy. But, y'know, I can't, uh, I don't know, uh, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna bust it out, I'm just gonna make it happen, man, just gonna make it happen. All right
[Intro (1:57)]
Ah, ah
Ah, that's my ad-lib
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
[Verse 1]
Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As it makes you stop, think
You'll think you're looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish although I like the Chalet, Swiss
I know I like the sushi because it's never touch a frying pan
Hot like wasabi when I bust rhymes
Big like LeAnn Rimes because I'm all about value
Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits
You try to match wits
You try to hold me but I bust through
Gonna make a break, I take a fake
I like this shit stinking shake, Steak 'n Shake
I like vanilla, it's the finest of the flavors
Gotta see the show 'cause then you'll know the vertigo is gonna grow
'Cause it's so dangerous, you'll have to sign a waiver
[Interlude]
And that's sort of part one of my freestyle. Um, I think it's really good. I wrote another part of it, too. Sorry, um, I have a bit of a condition that causes me to, ah, do that. Um, it happens a lot when I'm rapping, but, um, y'know, it's, uh, it's not anything to-to worry about. Um, lemme try to get this second verse here out before my condition comes back. I felt it a little, uh, uh, uh! Sorry, I felt, I felt it a little bit there, um, yeah, I felt it a little bit there. Okay, sorry, let me, let me get through the rest of this freestyle
[Verse 2 (3:37)]
Chikadee China, the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops stickin'
Watch your X Files with no lights on
We're down Amazon
I hope the Smoking Man's in this one
Like Harrison Ford, I'm getting frantic
Like Sting and tantric
Like Snickers guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurosawa, I make mad films
Okay, I don't make films
But if I did, they'd have a samurai
Gonna get a, gets a set of better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs so my irons aren't always flying off the backswing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon because that cartoon got the boom anime babes
That make me think the wrong thing, uh
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean? You soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of losing my shirt
It's been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms by your sides and said, "I'm sorry"
Five days since I laughed at you and said, "You did just what I thought you were gonna do"
Three days since the living room
We realizing we're both to blame but what could we do?
Yesterday, you just smiled at me
But it'll still be two days until we say we're sorry
Bitch