Dave Malloy
Murder Ballet Part Three
[YUSAPOOF]
Did he eat the cookies?
[MURDERER #2]
Yes he did
Yes he did
[YUSAPOOF]
And did he drink the wine?
[MURDERER #3]
Yes he did
Yes he did
Yes he did
Yes he did
[YUSAPOOF]
The wine and the cookie covered in poison?
[YUSAPOOF/MURDERERS]
The wine and the cookie covered in poison
[YUSAPOOF]
Well good
That's that
He must be well dead laying dead flat
[MURDERER #2]
He's not dead flat
[YUSAPOOF]
What do you mean he's not dead flat?
[MURDERER #3]
Hе's not dead flat
[YUSAPOOF]
What do you mean he's not dеad flat?
[MURDERER #2]
Well he ate the cookies
[MURDERER #3]
And he drank the wine
[YUSAPOOF]
What the hell
What the hell
What the hell
What the hell
What the hell
What the hell
What the hell
[MURDERER #3]
He made us sing
[MURDERER #2]
And he kept on drinking
[MURDERERS]
He made us sing
[MURDERER #3]
Kind of embarrassing
Normally I don't do that kind of thing for strangers
But he made us sing
[YUSAPOOF]
Oh god oh god oh god oh god
This is not good
Go in there now and punch him in the face
[MURDERER #3]
I'm not doin' that
No way
[YUSAPOOF]
Go in there now and punch him in the face
[MURDERER #2]
I'm not doin' that
No way
No way
[YUSAPOOF]
Well then...
Take this pistol and shoot him in the face
Shoot him in the face
[MURDERERS]
You have a pistol?
You have a pistol?
Why did we poison him if we could have shot him?
[YUSAPOOF]
This is a good point
[MURDERERS]
We know
We know it is a good point
We know we know
[YUSAPOOF]
Well then well then well then
Go inside go inside and shoot him in the face
Shoot him in the face
[MURDERER #3]
This is crazy
I've never shot anyone ever
[YUSAPOOF]
Well let me ask
Have you ever poisoned anyone before?
[MURDERERS]
No never
[YUSAPOOF]
Well then go inside
Go inside and shoot him in the face
Shoot him in the face
[MURDERER #2]
I'm nervous
[YUSAPOOF]
Don't be nervous
[MURDERER #3]
I'm nervous too
[YUSAPOOF]
Don't be nervous
Be confident
[MURDERER #3]
Okay
[YUSAPOOF]
Be confident
[MURDERER #2]
Okay
[YUSAPOOF]
Now go in there and shoot him with this shooter
[YUSAPOOF/MURDERERS]
Shoot him with this shooter
Shoot him with this shooter