[Verse 1]
I still remember, the thirteenth of August
You and your Dyson, you said "she looked very good on Facebook Marketplace"
Only if you knew, how much I liked you
But I watch your eyes as she

[Pre-Chorus]
Rolls by
What a sight for sore eyes
Better than your Black and Decker
She's got you mesmerized while I die

[Chorus]
Why would you ever cord me?
I'm not even half as suction-y
You gave her your attention, it's just a Dyson vacuum
But you like her better, I wish I were your Dyson

[Verse 2]
Watch as she stands with you holding her handle
Put your arm 'round her dust bag, now I'm getting colder
But how could I hate her? She's just a vacuum
But then again, kinda wish she were dead as she

[Pre-Chorus]
Rolls by
What a sight for sore eyes
Better than your Black and Decker
She's got you mesmerized while I die
[Chorus]
Why would you ever cord me?
I'm not even half as suction-y
You gave her your attention, it's just a Dyson vacuum
But you like her better, I wish I were your Dyson

[Bridge]
Oh
I wish I were your Dyson
Oh
I wish I were your Dyson

[Chorus]
Why would you ever cord me?
I'm not even half as suction-y
You gave her your attention, it's just a Dyson vacuum
But you like her better, I wish I were your Dyson Ball Corded Vacuum