[Chorus]
Wonder, oh, why this ever had to be? (Uh-huh)
So many losing hope in those dreams that they—
[Verse 1]
Walkin' past the homeless in a Rolex
Just got off the stage on the TODAY Show and I basically felt soulless
Years go by and I keep saying I'm gon' use my phone less
But I should just be phone-less
Ignorance is bliss and so is bein' underground
'Cause it was fun when we were known less
Sorry, that's cliche, I know I'm so blessed
But Jason keeps on tellin' me, "Say yes"
And truth be told, I know he knows best
But I don't wanna do no press
I've seen enough of me on this lil' screen
I've become so vain and insecure 'bout everything
I feel all this pressure to live up to what they tell me I'm gon' be
So I isolate myself, you can't help me, it's on me
I'm hidin' any sign of weakness from my guys
I don't want 'em second-guessin' with me
Nemo said to keep my foot on necks 'cause I can't let 'em just forget me
But the brags in my raps are getting less and less convincing
So I'd rather just (Wonder)
[Chorus]
Oh, why this ever had to be?
So many losing hope in those dreams that they—
[Verse 2]
I wrote that first verse in Denver back in September
It's January now and I'm feelin' like myself again
I got Angel back in here, I need his help again
I'm takin' time away but wonderin' what a healthy helping is
Fuck it, they gon' check for me, I tell myself and tell my friends
Avoidin' any talks about the elephant
Chalkin' up the hate to jealousy and just embellishments
But deep down, I find myself wonderin'
If the people that write about me are right about me
And I wonder if my exes are oversharin' 'cause they know a lot about me
I'm a long way from Shelby County
I been through some local tension, heard talks of a healthy bounty
Sober and focused, I cannot walk down no deli alleys
I still got the fellas 'round me, I love 'em and tell 'em proudly
My mama needs help adjusting, my father needs help accounting
I'm lookin' out heaven's window, I know that there's hell around me and—
[Chorus]
Wonder, oh, why this ever had to be?
So many losing hope in those dreams that they—