Rachel Bloom
I’m the Bride of the Pirate King
[VALENCIA]
When he came to my town upon his ship
He pillaged and plundered and looted
"You're mine now" he said with a devilish grin
"Submit or be executed!"
Yet now that I'm his bride
I feel nothing but warmth deep inside

I love the pirate king
I sit on his lap and sing
He calls me his sparrow, his lamb, his pet
His rough pirate kisses I'll never forget
He hits me, but he don't mean no harm
Those slaps are part of his piratish charm
Sometimes I say "Stop it," but deep down I know
If I didn't like it, I'd have left long ago

I love the pirate king
He calls me by name, and it means one thing
He's craving my touch warm and deep
He takes his pleasure even when I'm asleep
If I die at his hand, it won't be a surprise
'Cause my love for the pirate king is true and pure and wise