Wayyyy back college boy asked to a high school dance
Couldn't wait, but my date was in my friend's pants
Didn't know what to do, MC feelin blue
'Til my best friend said that the red would get me through
Went to the Jewel with my crew, adults only box
In a secondhand suit, bow tie, I'm a fox
In a car on the street, mouth Swisher Sweet
Down that shit at my crib in a one gulp feat
Room starts to turn like cheese
My tummy starts to churn like grease
On my knees like a rug burn beast
Like an intern tease with a yeast ("Infection!")
All wild on the tile, feel like I got the flu
I think I'm gonna throw, I think this night is through
Ding-dong, date's arrived and her dress is ripped
She don't know I'm on a Robitussin trip
In the back two girls goin' stag
Fat asses, I demand from the date her sunglasses
Do a drop, roll out the car like Axl
I need an angel, I need some fuckin Advil
I got a buzz bigger than a beehive
Cough up my cookies let loose what's on the inside

The 'tussin, the 'tussin - put it down like it was nothin'
RoboCop couldn't stop me from pukin' and flushin'
No balls to be bustin', no fightin', no cussin'
Just love for a drug called Robitussin
The 'tussin, the 'tussin - put it down like it was nothin'
RoboCop couldn't stop me from pukin' and flushin'
No balls to be bustin', no fightin', no cussin'
Just love for a drug called Robitussin

Wayyyy back college boy, live on 11th floor
Head out my window, wonder what I'm livin' for
Knock on my door what's in store, it's my buddy "Bucks"
With the rabbit ear pockets sayin he is out of luck
Need a forty for party thrown by Laura Kang at Ruben
All he's got is snot and a box full of Ludens
Tell him 'bout the 'tussin, we're hating ho hustlin'
Interruptin discussions about Reaganomic repercussions
Fuck 'em, we're fuckin' chug-a-luggin'
Soon my stomach I'm huggin'
I'm trippin' or somethin'
My coat I button, keep it down like a dungeon
You could call me the cough medicine curmudgeon
Frankly, the feeling's fucking fantastic
I'm tripping like Jesus in the desert when he fasted
Like it's the night before we all get drafted
Like we're rowin' through some rapids with Kevin Bacon
Whitewater raftin'
("Like you're at Epcot Center on acid?")
Exactly
The 'tussin, the 'tussin
Put it down like it was nothin'
RoboCop couldn't stop me from pukin' and flushin'
No balls to be bustin', no fightin', no cussin'
Just love for a drug called Robitussin

The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*moan*}
The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*moan*}
The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*puking*}
Robitussin!
The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*moan*}
The 'tussin, the 'tussin!
The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*puking*}
Robitussin!
The 'tussin, the 'tussin!
The 'tussin, the 'tussin! {*puking*}
The 'tussin, the 'tussin!
{*continues puking and spitting*}
Ahhhh!