SCENE IV (Count Dorante, Monsieur Jourdain, Madame Jourdain, Nicole)

DORANTE:
My dear friend, Monsieur Jourdain, how do you do?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Very well, sir, to render you my small services.

DORANTE:
And Madame Jourdain there, how is she?

MADAME JOURDAIN:
Madame Jourdain is as well as she can be.

DORANTE:
Well! Monsieur Jourdain, you are excellently well dressed!

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
You see.

DORANTE:
You have a fine air in that suit, and we have no young men at court who are better made than you.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Well! well!

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) He scratches him where it itches.

DORANTE:
Turn around. It's positively elegant.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) Yes, as big a fool behind as in front.

DORANTE:
My faith, Monsieur Jourdain, I was strangely impatient to see you. You are the man in the world I esteem most, and I was speaking of you again this morning in the bedchamber of the King.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
You do me great honor, sir. (To Madame Jourdain) In the King's bedchamber!

DORANTE:
Come, put on . . .

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Sir, I know the respect I owe you.

DORANTE:
Heavens! Put on your hat; I pray you, no ceremony between us.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Sir . . .
DORANTE:
Put it on, I tell you, Monsieur Jourdain: you are my friend.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Sir, I am your humble servant.

DORANTE
: I won't be covered if you won't.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
(Putting on his hat) I would rather be uncivil than troublesome.

DORANTE:
I am in your debt, as you know.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
Yes, we know it all too well.

DORANTE:
You have generously lent me money upon several occasions, and you have obliged me with the best grace in the world, assuredly.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Sir, you jest with me.

DORANTE:
But I know how to repay what is lent me, and to acknowledge the favors rendered me.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
I have no doubt of it, sir.

DoRANTE:
I want to settle this matter with you, and I came here to make up our accounts together.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
There wife! You see your impertinence!

DORANTE:
I am a man who likes to repay debts as soon as I can.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
(Aside to Madame Jourdain) I told you so.

DORANTE:
Let's see how much do I owe you.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
(Aside to Madame Jourdain) There you are, with your ridiculous suspicions.

DORANTE:
Do you remember well all the money you have lent me?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
I believe so. I made a little note of it. Here it is. Once you were given two hundred louis d'or.

DORANTE:
That's true.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Another time, six-score.

DORANTE:
Yes.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
And another time, a hundred and forty.

DORANTE:
You're right.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
These three items make four hundred and sixty louis d'or, which comes to five thousand sixty livres.

DORANTE:
The account is quite right. Five thousand sixty livres.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
One thousand eight hundred thirty-two livres to your plume-maker.

DORANTE: Exactly.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Two thousand seven hundred eighty livres to your tailor.

DoRANTE:
It's true.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Four thousand three hundred seventy-nine livres twelve sols eight deniers to your tradesman.

DORANTE:
Quite right. Twelve sols eight deniers. The account is exact.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
And one thousand seven hundred forty-eight livres seven sols four deniers to your saddler.

DORANTE:
All that is true. What does that come to?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Sum total, fifteen thousand eight hundred livres.

DORANTE:
The sum total is exact: fifteen thousand eight hundred livres. To which add two hundred pistoles that you are going to give me, which will make exactly eighteen thousand francs, which I shall pay you at the first opportunity.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) Well, didn't I predict it?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Peace!

DORANTE:
Will that inconvenience you, to give me the amount I say?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Oh, no!

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) That man is making a milk-cow out of you!

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Be quiet!

DoRANTE:
If that inconveniences you, I will seek it somewhere else.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
NO, Sir.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) He won't be content until he's ruined you.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Be quiet, I tell you.

DORANTE:
You have only to tell me if that embarrasses you.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Not at all, sir.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) He's a real wheedler!

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Hush.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) He'll drain you to the last sou.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
Will you be quiet?

DORANTE:
I have a number of people who would gladly lend it to me; but since you are my best friend, I believed I might do you wrong if I asked someone else for it.

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
It's too great an honor, sir, that you do me. I'll go get it for you.

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) What! You're going to give it to him again?

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN:
What can I do? Do you want me to refuse a man of this station, who spoke about me this morning in the King's bedchamber?

MADAME JOURDAIN:
(Aside) Go on, you're a true dupe.