[Verse 1: Shorty Long]
I got a song, it's a pretty good song
Only one thing wrong with a pretty good song
'Cause a pretty good song goes along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along and along and along
'Til it gets me red in the face
'Cause it ain't got no swallerin' place

[Verse 2: Shorty Long]
Now here's that tune, it's a pretty nice tune
But I just ain't built like a rubber balloon
It's a pretty nice tune but I croon
And I croon and I croon and I croon and I croon
And I croon and I croon and I croon and I croon
'Til I can't keep up with the pace
'Cause it ain't got no swallerin' place

[Bridge: Shorty Long]
I can finish a jack of Cracker Jacks
In fifteen seconds flat
And still keep conversation running fair
When I kiss my darlin' sweetheart
I can hold it half an hour
And I ain't half dead when I come up for air
[Verse 1: Shorty Long]
But durn this song, it's a pretty good song
Only one thing wrong with a pretty good song
'Cause a pretty good song goes along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along
Like a doggone marathon race
'Cause it ain't got no swallerin' place

[Skit: Frank Loesser & Shorty Long]
*Thump*
Hey, hey fellows, what happened?
Hey, that fellow that was singing here before
He just fell down, his face is all blue
Let's help him up, come on, gimme a hand
Hey, hey mister, hey, what happened to you?
Well, I'll, I'll tell you
It's, it's like this

[Verse 1: Shorty Long]
I got a song, it's a pretty good song
Only one thing wrong with a pretty good song
'Cause a pretty good song goes along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along and along and along
And along and along
'Til it gets me red in the face
'Cause it ain't got no swallerin' place