[Verse 1: Simon]
And so I dig sometimes for some coal and some stone
And I think to myself, I'm all alone
And then I, I saw a cute little piggy
And so I fed you some wheat and you followed me
All the way back to the factory
And then I screamed at the top of my lungs
"Best friends from now on!"

[Chorus: Simon]
And I say
Hey-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, hey-yeah-yeah
I said, "Hey! Best friends from now on!"
And I say
Hey-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, hey-yeah-yeah
I said, "Hey! Let's get this cookin' on!"

[Verse 2: Simon, Sips & Duncan]
And he fried!
Oh, my God, did I fry?
I fried all the pork
It's a taste infusion
And he grills!
Oh my God, did I grill?
It was such a thrill
Myah!
Pass the barbecue sauce
[Chorus: Simon & Martyn]
And I say
Hey-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, hey-yeah-yeah
I said, "Hey! My best friend has now gone!"
And I say
Don't cry for me (Hey-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, hey-yeah-yeah)
Just keep me inside (I said hey!)
Inside of your big dwarf belly
(Hey-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, hey-yeah)
Hey-yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah
Eating friends is so wrong