Eminem
Ritz
[Intro]
Yeah, boy, yeah, boy, yeah, girl
Let's take it back, swerve
Lemme hear that shit
Attention, K-Mart shoppers, chrr-chicka-chrr
Attention, K-Mart shoppers, K-Mart shoppers
There's a Blue Light Special, sales aren’t stoppin'
Still got the radar to—

[Verse 1]
Walk up in Target and spot a bargain like a Dalmatian
Zippin' up the aisle, racin', got The Salvation Army style blazer
I'm out chasin' the gals, mental hospital out-patient
A grown adult who acts like a baby, I'm so ado-lescent
Same old Harley-Davidson coat and flannel
Eight days in a row, Slim til I'm eighty years-old, fat ho
Still a cage that you don't rattle
Maybe that explains why you won't battle
'Cause you was okay in my book 'til you took a page from it, ho
My notepad'll explode next time you're in range of it though
Danger, unknown contaminants it contains in it, yo
Enough plutonium to blow up this whole stadium, ho, asshole
Guess shit don't change and it won't
Yeah, so if yesterday felt like the same day as before
That'll explain why it's Groundhog's Day again, ho, skidaddle
It's been Shady since you've been afraid of your own shadow
Aftermath to the grave
And we're takin' over the radio like it's changin' its own channel
And I wouldn't dial it back if it crank-yanked me and whoa
Still cranky and so zany, and oh, yeah, don't stop
[Chorus]
So here we go
Girl, who does it better? Let me know
La-di-da, came to party soon as I hit the door
Y'all are in deep doo-doo fo' sho' (Better get a pooper scooper)
It's Welfare cheese, saltines and Ritz Crackers
Faygo, no Mountain Dew
It's just Moon Mist (Mist, Mist)
When I'm at the Ritz (Yeah) (It's on my rider)

[Verse 2]
Talkin' about you savin' the day, bitch, who's savin' the decade
You nuts? Take a wild guess, who's crazy as heck? Wait
Fuck you think? You expect Ma$e? Cool J
In a suit playin' the flute, Michael Bublé doin' reggae?
So much my new jewels weigh, I get headaches
They're breathtakin', two huge chains, they're like pet snakes
Drippin' candyblue paint with a meth face swervin' through lanes on a segway
Bumpin' 2 Chainz in a neck brace (2 Chainz)
Too dangerous of a threat
Bomb brain of Saddam Hussein's head in a suitcase, when it detonates I–
Hold up, hey, you get the kids from school?
'Kay, cool, thanks
Impregnate a dead lady, eat bath salts, two faces and get maced
Get wasted, got a toothpaste with a cigarette taste that's lead-based (Ew)
Smells like glue paste then I'm on a peg leg
In a toupee sellin' bootlegs and casette tapes
[Chorus]
So here we go
Girl, who does it better? Let me know
La-di-da, came to party soon as I hit the door
Y'all are in deep doo-doo fo' sho' (Better get a pooper scooper)
It's Welfare cheese, saltines and Ritz Crackers
Faygo, no Mountain Dew
It's just Moon Mist (Mist, Mist)
When I'm at the Ritz (It's on my rider)

[Refrain]
And I'm
Dressed up like a million-dollar trooper
Tryna break a hundred for one Big Buford
One Big Buford

[Chorus]
And It's Welfare cheese, saltines and Ritz Crackers
Faygo, no Mountain Dew
It's just Moon Mist (Mist, Mist, Mist)
When I'm at the Ritz (Ha-ha) (It's on my rider)

[Verse 3]
Attention, K-Mart shoppers, chrr-chicka-chrr
Attention, K-Mart shoppers, K-Mart shoppers
That's your trademark if life imitates art
K-Mart to the graveyard, safeguard it like Braveheart
Ain't changin' a thing, dawg, my thoughts are gonna stay dark
So cold to this day, start
Defrostin' them ideas, even after I got 'em to cook and they still stayed raw
Because all them thoughts I thought of froze back up as soon as I thawed 'em (Thought 'em, thought 'em)
Must mean I'm so hot, I'm cold
So cold, I'm hot, I'm like autumn
'Cause I'm back to trippin' on all them
Motherfuckers, it just sucks I had to fall on my ass to hit my bottom
And the whole debacle was a God awful experience
But it also gave me an awesome source I could draw from
Now, don't bother callin' the law enforcement to stop him
There's a new sheriff in town, it's a Marshall law in his Gotham
Comin' through in a bra on a horse with Robin in boxing shorts
I'm too boxed in with a box of Newports and Hopsin
And your problem's compiled 'cause Marshall is wilin'
Drive a car through the side of Arkham Asylum and park in the dining room
Ain't no thoughts darker than mine are
Batshit cray, sometimes I just gotta remind him
Lady, nice bottom, it's top of the line and I'm
Lookin' forward to gettin' behind it
[Chorus]
So here we go
Girl, who does it better? Let me know
La-di-da, came to party soon as I hit the door
Y'all are in deep doo-doo fo' sho' (Better get a pooper scooper)
It's Welfare cheese, saltines and Ritz Crackers
Faygo, no Mountain Dew
It's just Moon Mist (Mist, Mist)
When I'm at the Ritz (It's on my rider)

[Outro]
Still a K-Mart shopper, ya bish, ya bish (Yeah)
Still a K-Mart shopper ya bish, ya bish (Bitch, I'm feelin nostalgic)
Still a Walmart shopper ya bish, ya bish (Suck my ballsack)
Still a Target shopper ya bish, ya bish (Heh)
You gon' try to out-white trash me? Still a—
Stifler's back (Shit)
Stifler's back
Stifler's back
Stifler's back
The party pooper
Ha-ha