[Verse 1]
Candlelight and moonlight all around us
I look into your eyes
You hold my hand underneath the table
And I can’t disguise the way I feel

[Pre-Chorus]
I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
For this night, I can’t believe
That it’s finally me and you, and you and me
Just us, and your friend Steve

[Chorus]
Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
Do-do-do do do-do do, leave!
What’s the deal with your friend Steve--
Hey! How's it going?

[Verse 2]
You took me out for waffles and to the movies
I was hoping for romance
You even took me to the Mexican circus
I thought there was a chance we’d be alone

[Pre-Chorus]
I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
For Steve to disappear
What the fuck’s your fucking problem?
Why’s he always here?
[Chorus]
Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
Do-do-do do do-do do, go away!
What’s the deal with your friend Steve--
Hey! How's it going?

[Bridge]
It’s not that I don’t like your friend
But how many hours with him can you spend?
And it’s not that I don’t think he’s great
But it's only you, only you I wanna fellate

[Verse 3]
Are you gay for Steve? I think you may be
And that would be alright
But let a bitch know just what your steez is
So I know if I should shave tonight

[Pre-Chorus]
I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
'Cause I like to be with you
But if it’s always me and you and your friend Steve
There’s nothing I can...

[Outro]
Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
Do-do-do do do-do do, seriously?
What’s the deal with your friend Steve?
Hey! How's it going...
You know, I don’t even care how he’s doing
Steve!