Andrew Lloyd Webber
Married Man
[EMMA]
I'll be discreet
I won't hiss at your wife when I see her
And though I'd love to be her
She'll never know it

I'll take the pill
I won’t upset the boats you're rowin'
Carry on the way you're goin'
I won't blow it

When baseball's on you can turn my set louder
You can rave all night about your wife's clam chowder
I'm sure it can work out just right
Don't mind bein' the candle you sometimes light
Married man, yes we can

Won't write things down
I'm not the type that keeps a diary
I know when to be fiery
Or plain placid

I won't look crushed
When you say your wife is prеtty
Bright and very witty
Pass the acid
I won't cry at all when you walk right by mе
I'd say you can't lose, you'd be a fool, come try me
She and I can cover each mood
One will be in heat while the other's subdued
Married sir, me and her

Won't call your club
And I'll never drive through Oyster Bay, dear
I won't give you away, dear
To your Bernice, love

If you should die
I won't attend the funeral service
No need to look so nervous
Rest in peace, love

When Christmas comes I'll choose your gifts and wrap them
When we make plans I won’t scream when you scrap them
There is nothing I wouldn't do
I'll be the perfect little mistress for you
Grant my wish, married dish