(Song)
Oh, Roger is my name
And laughter is my game
Come on, cowpoke
You're such a joke
Don't sit there on your brain

(Spoken)
Nice shirt! Who's your tailor, Quasimodo?

(Song)
I'm not that debonair
I'm just a silly hare
If you want class
I'll have to pass
So go get Fred Astaire

(Spoken)
Hey, he's good, but can he do this? Eat your heart out, Ginger Rogers

(Song)
My buddy's Eddie V
A sourpuss, you'll see
But when I'm done
He'll need no gun
'Cause a joker he will be
(Spoken)
C, D, E, F, G, H

(Song)
I love to raise some cain
Believe me, it's no strain
It feels so great
To smash a plate
And look, there is no pain
No pain
No pain