[Verse 1]
My finest suit
My one and only, starched and hung
Will finally get put to use
It’s the blackest hue, as I’ll meet your family
And include all of their families to make sure that you know

[Chorus]
If this isn’t romance, then, baby, I’ve got to go

[Verse 2]
My soles, they ache
I have to take a break
My two left feet don’t bend that way often enough to work
But I’ll insist and say
“You’ve got the wrong idea”
I’ve practiced and polished and proven technique, so you should know

[Chorus]
But if I'm not romantic, then, baby, I’ve got to go
Baby, I’ve got to go
Maybe I’ve got to go
Maybe I’ve got to go

[Bridge]
Through the motions to remind you that we’re still moving
‘Cause if Steve let me have my way, I’d sing like a dial tone all day
[Verse 3]
So, hold on to our dance
‘Cause I’ve only got two hands
With fingernails, filthy, they really don’t seem to work
And you need to hold one to know

[Chorus]
If that is romance, then, baby, I’ve got to
If that is romance, then, baby, I need to
If that is romance, then, baby, I’ve got to go