I'm ready, ready as anybody can be
I'm ready, ready as anybody can be
Now I'm ready for you, I hope you're ready for me

I got an axe handle pistol built on a graveyard frame
Shootin' tombstone bullets, wearin' ball and chain
I'm drinkin' TNT, smokin' dynamite, I hope some screwball start a fight

I'm ready, ready as anybody can be
Now I'm ready for you, I hope you're ready for me

All you pretty little chicks with your pretty little hair
I know you think that I ain't nowhere

But stop what your doin' an' look over here
I'll prove to ya, baby, that I ain't no square

I'm ready, ready as anybody can be
Now I'm ready for you, I hope you're ready for me

I been drinkin' gin like never before
I feel so good, babe, I want you to know
One more drink, and I wish you would
I takes a whole lotta lovin' to make me feel good, 'cause

I'm ready, ready as anybody can be
Now I'm ready for you, I hope you're ready for me