[Verse 1: Neil Tennant]
Talking of my attributes
The things I do so well
As anyone who's in cahoots
With me will readily tell
I've lived up here, I've been down there
I've bought so I could sell
And if I drove a faster car
I'd drive it bloody well
How could I change?
I live without restraint

[Chorus: Neil Tennant]
And I would try the patience of a saint
And I would try the patience of a saint

[Verse 2: Bernard Sumner]
Thinking of my attitudes
Talking one on one
I may disagree with you
But look where you've come from
And all that you've got
I thought that I would faint

[Chorus: Bernard Sumner]
But I would try the patience of a saint
And I would try the patience of a saint
I would try the patience of a saint
[Bridge: Neil Tennant & Bernard Sumner]
I'm talking to myself (I'm talking to myself)
Talking to myself
I'm talking to the one that I know best
I'm talking to the one that I know best

[Verse 3: Neil Tennant & Bernard Sumner]
Bury me with gratitude
You can go to hell
Why should I care?
I'd rather watch drying paint

[Chorus: Neil Tennant & Bernard Sumner]
But I would try the patience of a saint
And I would try the patience of a saint
I would try the patience of a saint
And I would try the patience
Of a saint