[Verse 1]
There's no charity in you
You took the eye in me
I never said you were a golden idol
With one extra arm or three or four
As you preyed upon mere mortals
That you were obliged to pick up
From the passing trade

[Chorus]
Hey kids, look at this
Can't you see I'm the world's great optimist
I could get up now if you insist
But you'll have to ask politely
If by chance I feel insulted
And by fortune I've been halted
When in time I catapulted
Into heaven I've been vaulted
Hey, kids, look at this
Can't you see I'm the world's great optimist

[Verse 2]
There's no vanity in me
Because I'm quite convinced
I think I finally got you out of my hair now
And I didn't have to rinse
Remember when I cried
And swore I'd never wash the lips you kissed
I bet you're really glad that I lied
[Chorus]
Hey kids, look at this
Can't you see I'm the world's great optimist
I could get up now if you insist
But you'll have to ask politely
If by chance I feel insulted
And by fortune I've been halted
When in time I catapulted
Into heaven I've been vaulted
Hey, kids, look at this
Can't you see I'm the world's great optimist