[Intro]
"Oh! No! No!"
Next
"Ah, yes, Mr. Gatekeeper. Now we have, uh, Joseph Bruce, also known as Violent J."
"Oh, yes. I've heard of that hideous fuck. Tell me, what makes you think I'd ever allow you into these pearly gates?"
"Wait, man. Let me explain, dog."

[Verse 1: Violent J]
First, I was born young and healthy
I told my mother one day I'd be wealthy
Can't forget my first day at school
Got stabbed in the head with a pencil, but it's cool
Get my education
A job and a family, a good reputation
And what about grade two?
Got shot in the neck, and the bullet went straight through
But I'm packing a textbook
Don't fuck with me 'cause I'm going to grade three
Thank God it's lunch in a minute
Bit into my hot dog with a razor blade in it
And it cut my tongue off
But I know how to multiply, so what's up, boss
Finally had to step out
I dropped out of school when they ripped my neck out
Who knows where the road led?
Seen a man with a briefcase, but no head
So I'm likes fuck that
Show me a quarter and an ounce of crack
And I'm straighter than a fucking light post
I sold a lot of crack, but I bought the most
[Verse 2: Violent J]
Now I'm a basehead down on my luck
Roaming the streets and got hit by a Mack truck
And thrown about a block
But I'm thinking nothing, but gimme a rock
Holding my sign "I'll work for crack"
With my old-ass E.T. shirt on my back
And I'm sleeping in the gutter
Right next to Champtown's mother
I'm eating dead rats in the street
I keep on checking for my own heartbeat
Now I'm weighing at a buck-o-five
Twitchy little neck and I'm barely alive
Got my first taste of life in hell
I ate a dead man, shh, but don't tell
Excuse me, sir, can you spare some change?
I'll cut your face off and eat your brains
You know all about me
You act like you ain't seen Penitentiary

[Interlude]
"We, the jury, find the defendant guilty of 47 counts of first degree murder."
"Hm. Very well. Mr. Bruce, do you have any last words before your sentence?"
"Yeah, your mother"
"Huh, fine. Life in prison, motherfucker!"
[Verse 3: Violent J]
Spitting and cussing and you know I'm pissed
With these iron bracelets on my fucking wrists
And I'm heading for the slammer
Serial killer, all on the camera
First day, they broke my back
Next day, they broke my neck
Third day, they broke my leg
Fourth day, they broke my head
Swallowing, kept on trucking
But there'll be no fucking
That's strictly for the soft
Ain't seen a freak in a week and my nuts fell off
So, I'm finna escape
How much shit can one klepto take?
"Stop, fool. Stop or I'll fire"
Shot me off and I fell in the razor wire
I'm all tangled up
Cut-cut-cut, slit, slit, cut-cut
You don't love me, I really don't care
Tie my ass up in the electric chair
Got no family, I got no friends
So, I pray to God that my life ends

[Interlude]
"Do you have any last words, my son?"
Yes, Father, I do
So what!
[Bridge: Violent J]
They thought that they had killed me
They took me to the morgue
I'm just a little stiff that's all (that's all)
Like a board
I lay there in my coffin
Just chill, and wait, and chill (and chill)
But then I jump out, knife swinging all about and
Motherfucking-mother-mother-mother-motherfucking kill

[Verse 4: Violent J]
I used to wonder what life's about
'Til it chewed me up and spit me out
Your ghetto created a psycho nut
Not just psycho, psycho nut
Now, I'm living in the walls of your house
And I'll die in there, and lay, and rot like a dead mouse
I'm packing a sickle
I'm on your roof and I'm playing the fiddle
You want me in a straight jacket?
'Cause when I see a throat, I'ma hack it
Where I'm at? What's my name?
Somehow, somewhere, I got hit by a train
And it ripped my legs off
Huh, nothing but a minor cough
You can't get me, I swing from a tree
Shouting, and cussing, and shooting at me
Everybody's adding their two cents
My branch broke and I fell on a picket fence
I'm stuck and they're coming to get me
Ripped myself off and I took my lungs with me
I'm stuffing them back in
Fuck, they won't go back in
Now, my life's getting dense
'Cause my heart's still beating on a wooden fence
They shoot me up and down
Wicked, wicked, wicked, clown
Wicked, wicked, wicked, clown
You wanna know about a wicked clown?

[Outro: Violent J]
You want to know? (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know? (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know all about a wicked clown? (Wicked clown is in the house)
A wicked clown (Wicked clown is in the house)
A wicked clown (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know about a wicked clown? (Wicked clown is in the house)
I never had it made (Wicked clown is in the house)
I never had it made (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know? (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know I never had it made? (Wicked clown is in the house)
A wicked clown (Wicked clown is in the house)
A wicked clown (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know? (Wicked clown is in the house)
You want to know about a wicked clown? (Wicked clown is in the house)
(Wicked clown is in the house)
(Wicked clown is in the house)
(Wicked clown is in the house)

[Skit]
"Boy?"
"Yeah, Pa?"
"Run and fetch your sister. I'm a little horny over here."
"Yes'm."
"Getcha goin'. Go on."
"I'ma get 'em. I'ma get 'em, Pa."