Listen up brothers and sisters, come hear my desperate tale
I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegetables live in oppression, served on our tables each night
The killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers, coleslaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings, just 'cause a radish can't scream

I've heard the screams of the vegetables (scream scream scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy (burning off calories)
How do you think that feels (bet it hurts really bad)
Carrot Juice constitutes murder (and that's a real crime)
Greenhouses' prisons for slaves (let my vegetables grow)
It's time to stop all this gardening (it's as dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade (is a spade is a spade is a spade...)

I saw a man eating celery, so I beat him black and blue
If he ever touches a sprout again, I'll bite him clean in two
I'm a political prisoner trapped in a windowless cage
'cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips by killing five men in a rage
I told the judge when he sentenced me, this is my finest hour
I'd kill those farmers again just to save one more cauliflower

I've heard the screams of the vegetables (scream scream scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy (burning off calories)
How do you think that feels (bet it hurts really bad)
Carrot Juice constitutes murder (and that's a real crime)
Greenhouses' prisons for slaves (let my vegetables grow)
It's time to stop all this gardening (it's as dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade (is a spade is a...)

How low as people do we dare to stoop
Making young broccoli's bleed in the soup
Untie your beans, uncage your tomatoes, let potted plants free
Don't mash that potato ooooh oooooh oooooh

I've heard the screams of the vegetables (scream scream scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (fates in the stir fry are sealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy (you fat gourmet slob)
How do you think that feels (leave them out in the fields)
Carrot Juice constitutes murder (V8's genocide)
Greenhouses prisons for slaves (yes your compost's a grave)
It's time to stop all this gardening (take up macramé)
Let's call a spade a spade (is a spade is a spade is a spade is a spade is a spade is a spade...)
Power to the peas
Give peas a chance
All we are saying is give peas a chance