[Verse 1]
Brian, top marks for not trying
So kind of you to bless us with your effortlessness
We're grateful and so strangely comforted
And I wonder, are you putting us under?
'Cause we can't get our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination
Well, see you later, innovator

[Spoken Interlude]
We are the Arctic Monkeys from High Green, baby!

[Verse 2]
Some want to kiss, some want to kick you
There's not a net you couldn't slip through
Or at least that's the impression I get
'Cause you're smooth and you're wet
And she's not aware yet, but she's yours
Shе'll be saying, "Use me, show mе the jacuzzi"
I imagine that it's there on a plate, your whole rendezvous rate
Means that you'll never be frightened to make 'em wait for a while
I doubt it's your style not to get what you set out to acquire
The eyes are on fire, you are the unforecasted storm

[Verse 3]
(Brian) Calm, collected and commanding
(Top marks for not trying) You leave the other story standing
With your renditions and jokes, bet there's hundreds of blokes
That have wept 'cause you've stolen their thunder
Are you putting us under?
'Cause we can't get our eyes off the t-shirt and ties combination
Well, see you later, innovator
[Spoken Outro]
Thank you very much