[DINO, spoken]
What—back already?

[ARTIE, spoken]
Her father was waiting up for her. 
But I think I laid some nice groundwork for next Saturday night. 

[TED, spoken]
Ah, the story of my life. Next Saturday night. 

[ARTIE, spoken]
In the meantime we have this—the Bachelor's Home Companion. 

[ALL]
Things'd be different any other might instead
But we're on our own
On a Saturday night
With no one to phone
On a Saturday night
And when you're alone
On a Saturday night
You might as well be dead!