Stephen Sondheim
Dainty June and Her Farmboys

[FARMBOYS]
Extra! Extra! Hey, look at the headline!
Historical news is being made!
Extra! Extra! They're drawing a red line
Around the biggest scoop of the decade!

A barrel of charm, a fabulous thrill!
The biggest little headline in vaudeville!

[FARMBOYS, spoken]
Presenting
In person
That five-foot-two bundle of dynamite
Dainty June!

[JUNE, spoken]
Hello, everybody!
My name is June!
What's yours?

[JUNE]
I have a moo cow
A new cow
A true cow
Named Caroline
[COW]
Moo, moo, moo, moo...

[JUNE]
She's an extra-special friend of mine

[COW]
Moo, moo, moo, moo...

[JUNE]
I like everything about her fine!

[COW]
Moo, moo, moo, moo...

[JUNE]
She likes to moo in the moonlight
When the moody moon appears
And when she moos in the moonlight
Gosh, it's moosic to my ears—
She's so moosical!

She loves a man cow
A tan cow
Who can cow
Her with a glance
When he winks at her, she starts to dance
It's what grown-ups call a real romance
But if we moved to the city
Or we settled by the shore
She'll make the move
'Cause she loves me more!