[Intro]
We packed our bags, we hopped a plane
We left our happy home
(Uh, Francine singing's kind of illegal here)
The culture seemed a bit insane
But you said "Hey, when in Rome"
(Uh, seriously Francine, ixnay on the inging—)
Maybe you've got no reason to complain
But I've got no Y chromosome
So here's what I don't like about Saudi Arabia
Hit it!

[Verse 1]
You can't go out unless you are escorted by a man
And when you do you come back with a buttcrack full of sand
No alcohol, no rum and cokes and no Dom Pérignon
At least a girl can have a smoke (But not on Ramadan)

[Chorus 1]
Oh, it's a land of joy
If you are a boy
But if you are a girl
It's the worst place in the world

[Bridge]
(Okay, Francine, we get it)
Oh, but I'm just getting started
[Verse 2]
American girls, we do pilates
Starve ourselves until we're hotties
Why? Because we like our bodies
Check me out, you uptight Saudis

[Chorus 2]
Oh it's so awfully grand (Come on, Francine, stop singing)
If you are a man (I'm only backup singing)
If you don't take me home soon, Stan, I think I'm gonna hurl
It's the worst place in the world

[Bridge]
(I started this point system and she's way behind)

[Verse 3]
I only want to see the world, explore and socialize
But in this town I can't so much as look at other guys
'Cause if I did, they'd call me harlot, whore, adulteress
I bet my last three all you fellas won't approve of this
Who wants a kiss?

[Chorus 3]
It's great if you're from Mars, but not if you're from Venus
If you wanna drive a car, you'd better have a penis
So if you've got a vagina, a vulva, a clitoris...
(What is a clitoris?)
And a labia
(You see where I'm going with this)
Stay the hell away from Saudi Arabia