Sellotape is sticky
Now there's a surprise
Next they'll tell you you can see out of your eyes
Mummified mummies daddies little girl
Had the operation then became an earl

Once you would have kissed her gently on the cheek
Now she kisses you beginning with your feet
Roles that are reversing so misunderstood
Kids who think monogamy is a piece of wood

Ooh but two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed

These days as a woman you are out of place
If you're not a lesbian whose friends are gays
Anything is normal normal is of course
Getting married after planning your divorce

Usually I don't go much at all on twins
Once you've seen the one you've seen them both I think
Mind you when they're pretty pretty as a peach
Whose to say that on the day with one of each

Ooh two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed
I look like I wanna look I wear what I like
It won't be a suit and no it won't be a tie
A tie is a dead heat not a knot round your neck
Neck is what you do when
Alone with your girlfriend

Ooh but two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed
Two's company three is allowed