[Verse]
Will shakespeare thought that fellows creep
"Unwillingly to school,"
And must to pore o'er knowledge deep
Be driven like a mule
The classics were the goals pursued
By boys in willie's day
The english tongue was far too rude
Save for the common play
New teachings have sprung up since then
We've buried all that rot
We will no longer wield the pen!
We have the turkey trot
We care not what old tullius raves
And really must confess:
He should have sunk beneath the waves
Ere catiline's address
The greatest julius when he stood
Most mighty o'er the mass
With all his tact he never could
Have thrown a forward pass
At homer who told tales of troy
We raise an awful din
We'd rather hear sir eddie foy
Sing "ragtime violin."
Salome too was not the whirl
The semites used to think
Why miss deslys could make that girl
Sit down and take a drink
For modes and ways have changed a bit
Since shakespeare was a boy
The empty fads have made a hit
And ignorance is joy