[Verse]
Behold the way our fine feathered friend
His virtue doth parade
Thou knowest not, my dim-witted friend
The picture thou hast made
Thy vacant brow, and thy tousled hair
Conceal thy good intent
Thou noble upright truthful sincere
And slightly dopey gent
You're my funny valentine
Sweet comic valentine
You make me smile with my heart
Your looks are laughable, un-photographable
Yet, you're my favorite work of art

[Outro]
Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak, are you smart?
But, don't change a hair for me
Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine, stay!
Each day is Valentine's Day [x2]