Uuurgh!

I want to take your leave but there's a policeman eyeing me (Hey!)
You know he's there every week I wonder what his query can be (...got a peaked cap)
My knees are desperately weak and I, oh, my calf, maah, the string in me leg's gone and the cop's killing me

Well, I know a girl who wears a python coat and it hisses when she comes
And she's got a three legged goat originally belonged to her mother, and it misses her mother when it runs
Ah, this house is such a mess, it's full of queens and nuns

I'll swap you my penny black for a wholesome glimpse of your bits
You see, I never seen those kind of things since I had a wife whose tits made me cheat at cards, and in hearts. Unh!
Hey, is that natives dancing, na-a-ah, it's just a team of tarts

Andrew, don't put me on like this again
Just because I'm the oldest has been according to the itinerary
You should have warned the public, not me
That John, George, Paul and Ringo or Linda or Yoko weren't on this bloody record in the first place