[Chorus]
Today, I don't feel like doing anything (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Just wanna jerk in my bed (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Don't feel like picking up my cell
'Cause I'll be jerking off like hell
'Cause today, I swear, I'm not doing anything

[Post-Chorus]
Just jerking off

[Verse 1]
Gonna kick my shoes off, then pull down my pants
Find some good porn, then lube up my hands
Hope I don't get caught by Mom again (It's called "knocking")
Get a text from my Dad, In the middle of twerking
Put it out my mind, but it really ain't workin'
Now I'm thinking 'bout my fuckin' Dad (Goddamnit!)

[Pre-Chorus]
Oh-oh, yes, I'm rubbin'
I'm tuggin', I think I'm 'bout to blast

[Chorus]
Today, I don't feel like doing anything (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Just wanna jerk in my bed (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Don't feel like picking up my cell
'Cause I'll be jerking off like hell
'Cause today, I swear, I'm not doing anything
[Post-Chorus]
Just jerking off
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah, ah
Just jerking off
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah, ah

[Verse 2]
Tomorrow, I'll wake up, get my junk up and stretch
Ice it down for a while, then start beating again
And imma scream out, "This is great!" (Oh my God, this is great!)
Lookin' at midget porn on my father's PC
Better clear the history, or he'll be pissed at me
I'm sorry pops, my wiener just can't wait (I have a problem)

[Pre-Chorus]
Oh-oh, yes, I'm rubbin'
I'm tuggin', I think I'm 'bout to blast

[Chorus]
Today, I don't feel like doing anything (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Just wanna jerk in my bed (Ah-ah-ah, Ah-ah-ah)
Don't feel like picking up my cell
'Cause I'll be jerking off like hell
'Cause today, I swear, I'm not doing anything

[Post-Chorus]
Just jerking off
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah, ah
Just jerking off
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah, ah