The days are passing like leaves
falling from a dead tree
Some fall slowly, some quickly,
while others go barely noticed
Some are green, most are brown,
and rotting
How long do I have left
I still cry over the smallest things
Just last week I accidentally
crushed an ant and broke down
Just last week my heart shattered
and I wait to be found
Just last week I was 5 years old and
didn't worry about anything
Just last week I swear that I was
okay
Sometimes I become afraid of who
I'm becoming
What if I don't want to live with
myself
What if my body can't be a home
that I start a warm fire in
What if my stomach always feels
too bloated
And my arms hang too low
And my smile is too crooked
And my brain movеs too slow
I'm getting older now
And yet my mind has nеver felt
younger
My mind has never felt more
scared, more helpless, more alone
I stare at my phone screen waiting
for a notification
Maybe if they tell me, I'll finally
believe it, but nothing appears
Just last week I didn't care what
others thought
Just last week I laughed without a
second thought
Just last week I wasn't trapped in
my thoughts
I'm getting older now
And my fingers grasp for any sense
of relief
Tell me you need me so I can feel
purpose again
Tell me I'm important in this god
forsaken world and I won't be
forgotten
Tell me anything to make me feel
good
I don't care if it's true, tell me
anything, talk to me
I'm getting older now
And I've lost my friends in the
woods
I'm screaming for help but the trees
won't answer back
They don't care
And the dirt tries to swallow me
and my lungs begin to crack
I'm getting older now
My knees shake, my heart breaks,
my brain fogs, my eyes blur
Where did you all go
I can't see you, for my eyes have fallen out
I can't hear you, for my ears ring so
loud
I can't touch you, as my hands have
gone numb
I'm getting older now
Just last week I thought I might
make it
Just last week I dreamt of a healthy
future
Just last week I finally slept well
Just last week I didn't question
everything that I have done
Just last week I swear I was
somebody else
Just last week I hadn't gone numb
But now I'm getting colder