[Intro]
Hello there, I'm here today to talk about the importance of independent venues
I'm also secretly hoping that by agreeing to talk about the importance of independent venues
I will then be in a position to move away from playing independent venues

[Verse 1]
I'm no good with elocution
To get myself into the institution
So I can win some donkey straw
Get a frame and put it on my fuckin wall

[Chorus]
I wish I had the time
To be a wanker just like you
And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm
Just like you

[Refrain]
Elocution
Elocution

[Chorus]
I wish I had the time
To be a wanker just like you
And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm
Just like you
[Verse 2]
It's a suicide mission
To go online and knock the opposition
But I don't want no donkey straw
Cos I wee'd in the corner near the stable door
And I buzz, career tabs death
Little one liners
Little clever shithouse fivers
In the scope that the hands of the shite have took
Took to the pegs in the coats where the bones hang up
Hey

[Chorus]
I wish I had the time
To be a wanker just like you
And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm
Just like you

[Bridge]
I'm no good with elocution
I'm no good with elocution

[Chorus]
I wish I had the time
To be a wanker just like you
And maybe then, I'd be somewhere lovely and warm
Just like