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Roger Miller
The Best Of All Possible Worlds

I was runnin' through the summer rain tryin' to catch that evenin' train
And kill that old familiar pain weevin' through my tangled brain
But when I tipped my bottle back I smacked into a cop I didn't see
That policeman said Mr Cool if you're ain't drunk then you're a fool
I said well if that's against the law then tell me why I never saw
A man locked in that jail of yours who wadn't just as lowdown poor as me
Well that was when someone turned out the lights
And I wound up in jail to spend the nights
And dream of all the wine and lonely girls in this best of all possible worlds
Well I woke up next morning feelin' like my head was gone
And like my thick old tongue was lickin' somethin' sick and wrong
And I told that man I'd sell my soul if somethin' wet and cold is that old cell
That kindly jailer just grinned at me all eaten up with sympathy
Then he bought himself another beer and came and whispered in my ear
That booze was just a dime a bottle boy you couldn't even buy the smell
I said I knew there was somethin' I liked about this town
But it takes more than that to bring me down down down down
But there's still a lot of wine and lonely girls in this best of all possible worlds
Well they finally came and they told me they was a gonna set me free
And I'd be leavin' town if I knew what was good for me
I said it's nice to learn that everybody's so concerned about my health
I said I won't be leavin' no more quicker than I fastly can
Cause I've enjoyed about this much of this as I can stand
And I don't need this town of yours more than I never needed nothin' else
Ha ha cause there's still a lotta drinks that I ain't drunk
Lots of pretty thoughts that I ain't never thought oh yeah
Lord there's still so many lonely girls in this best of all possible worlds