[Intro]
Me? I rap about games!
Yeah, we've gathered that by now
Who said I can't rap about board games, bro?
Somebody, presumably
Keepin' it old school, innit, bro?
Yes, it is
Check it!
Check it

[Verse 1]
I'm not a property magnate
I'm a property magnet
Your offers, I'm knocking them back quick
As if I'm popping a tablet
Not stopping 'til I've got in the last bid
I splash quids side to side like my ad-libs
Damn rich! Made of bread like a sandwich
Six-figure plus cash sums are my language
Turning every opportunity to my advantage
So, I can afford anything I've ever fancied
Shh, here's an advanced tip to fill up your bank quick
Buy everything you fricking can while you're in transit
Take out the other gangs quick, Bloods and Crips
Make their bank balance even tighter than your hand grips
Fingers clamp, zipped like a titanium vice
When I'm shaking the dice
You didn't take my advice and I'm not saying it twice
Alright, I'm saying it twice
I'm bankrupting you, so, say your goodbyes, uh
(Do not pass GO and do not collect two-hundred dollars)
[Hook 1]
I'm a cataclysm of capitalism
Stacking the dividends as I rap on the rhythm
I'm lacking humility, never lacking in income
This isn't a city, it's a kingdom
I got that Monopoly money
You're not going to take my property from me
I got that Monopoly money
You're not going to take my property from me

[Verse 2]
I'm not going to lie, the Monopoly guy
Looks impossibly fly in a top hat, moustache and a tie
I properly rock at Monopoly
You're probably not going to topple me
Even if your house burned down, it wouldn't be hot property
Got money on my mind, I might require a lobotomy
I'm all about the green and I'm not discussing botany
But ruck with me and I might need to lick some broccoli
You're economically unsound like an art degree
My pocket's deep enough to feed everyone sleeping rough
But you don't beat the competition treating poverty
I'm really sorry that there's people that aren't eating properly
I acknowledge it's a problem but not for me
What, you really think I'd know how to play fair
When I was raised in a hotel on Mayfair?
I'd prefer to stay here, you can stay there
But as you're passing by, you'd better pay the fare
[Hook 2]
I'm a cataclysm of capitalism
Stacking the dividends as I rap on the rhythm
I'm lacking humility, never lacking in income
This isn't a city, it's a kingdom
Monopoly, hot property
I am Dan Bull and I rock a beat
Monopoly, hot property
I am Dan Bull and I rock a beat

[Outro]
Has anyone ever actually finished a Monopoly game?
Without overturning the board
And throwing little buildings everywhere?
Not me, not me
(Consoles, you're next)