[Verse 1]
I hate pizza, it's so fucking bad
I hate eating dessert at the restaurant I just had
I hate cold leftovers, caramel makes me gag
But don't you get me started on meat and plastic bags
Fuck strawberry milkshakes, it's like ice cream blood
And fuck egg salad, it's wet, cold and tough
Sorry olives, fucking hate JetBlue
Cottage cheese can suck my dick and so can cheese that's blue

[Chorus]
These are the things I hate
These are the things I hate (I hate it)
Olive tapenade is gay
These are the things I hate

[Verse 2]
Hard-boiled eggs, more like soft soiled shit
Is this some fucking test? Are they supposed to smell like this?
Alfredo hurts my chest, come on, I'm a Jew
Candy cane is devil's rot, just take the gun and chew
And fruit cake is evil, why does it exist?
White chocolate is lethal, I think I have a zyst
I fucking hate this garbage truck, it's fucking loud as shit

[Chorus]
These are the things I hate (Fuck baked ziti too)
These are the things I hate
Olive tapenade is gay (It's so fucking gay)
These are the things I hate
These are the things I hate (And cotton candy can suck my dick)
These are the things I hate
Pray the tapenade away (Repent)
These are the things I hate
[Post-Chorus]
Fucking take it away
I fucking hate it
Ahh, I hate this shit so much
Fuck

[Outro]
I know you guys fucking hate something
I know you do, you can't not hate something
Not all of you can be positive all the time
It's okay to hate things
I hate baked ziti
I hate margarita pizza
And most of all I hate the fucking heat
Okay, I hate it, you could always add layers
But once you're naked, you're fucking done for, okay
You don't have to hate the same things as me
You probably fucking don't
But I know you hate something
And I want you to fucking scream it
Ahhhhh