I know a girl who
Think and goes
She'll make you breakfast
She'll make you toast

She don't use butter
She don't use cheese
She don't use jelly or
Any of these

She uses Vaseline
Vaseline

I know a guy who
Goes to shows
And when he's at home and
He blows his nose

He don't use tissues
Or his sleeve
He don't use napkins or
Any of these

He uses magazines
Magazines
And I know this girl who
Reminds me of Cher
She's always changing the
Color of her hair

But she don't use nothing
That you buy at the store
She likes her hairdo
To be real orange

She uses tangerines
Tangerines
Tangerines
Tangerines