[Intro (Spoken) - Tyler's Friend, Blonde-Haired Man and Tyler]

Hey, everybody! I suck!
[Tyler fires a gun into the window.]
WOO!
Damn. Tyler kinda... sucks
Okay, maybe he's a little rough around the edges...
A little?!
I have a drinking problem! Woo!
Dude, why do you hang out with him?
I'll tell you

[Verse 1]
He's not a bad guy, like, most of the time...
He just sucks sometimes! Why? Is that a crime?
Okay, fine, he's a bastard a hundred percent
But he's still my friend because I forget

He's been there for me since...
(Not at all!)
Does he have my back?
(If there's a knife involved!)
Please stop hitting on my girlfriend
What, dude, you gonna do me like that?

[Verse 2]
You can say it was 'cause the way he's raised
Is why he's gotta treat you like dirt
(Yeah...)
But the past explains, though it doesn't excuse
All the things he does; it still hurts
(Right)
He's not the friend that you thought he was
Was he ever that friend at all?
(No!)
It's up to you now to choose the path and that--
[Outro (Spoken)]
Go, Tyler! Go, Tyler, go! Go, Tyler! Go, Tyler, go!
[Tyler collapses on the ground. The Blonde-Haired Man looks at Tyler's Friend disapprovingly.]
What? I got lonely