[Part I: Beatles Part of Our Portion]
[Skit]
("The Star-Spangled Banner" plays in the background)
JAN: And now we've come to the Beatle portion of our show, in which--
DEAN (simultaneously): And now-- And now we've come to the part-- The Beatles part of our portion--
[Audience screams.]
JAN: [?]
DEAN: Oh. I'm sorry
JAN: Uh, the Beatles portion of our show--
DEAN (simultaneously): The Beatles part of our show--
JAN: Oh boy. [?]
JAN (continued): The Beatles part of our show--
DEAN (simultaneously): The Beatles part of our show--
(Audience screams)
JAN: Where we do a lot of Beatle--
(Audiencе screams)
JAN: And we do-- Then-- thеn, after that, we finish up by doing a lot of Beatles songs
(Audience screams)
JAN: And then--
DEAN: If that doesn't work--
JAN: If that doesn't work, we split
DEAN: Then we do the Cockroaches' songs
JAN (simultaneously): And then-- And then-- Ahem--
JAN & DEAN: (singing) Along came Jones...
JAN: This part of the show is where we sort of relax a little bit, everybody, just sort of lay back in your chair... We want to do this song again, because last show, they pressed erase instead of record. Which is actually better on some of our stuff...
DEAN: Yes
[Part II: Rhythm Section Introduction]
[Skit]
("Dixie" plays in the background)
JAN (continued): So, Dean would like to do his version-- his version of... Would like to do his... Oh, by the way, we'd like to introduce... our rhythm section. Starting from left to right... Over on the right side there, formerly with the Everly Brothers and also, formerly with Sonny & Cher, as a matter of fact, he does all of Sonny & Cher's records, Don Pete
DEAN: And his singing--
JAN: And the world's oldest teenager...
(Jan & Dean break into laughter. Music stops.)
JAN: Tommy Tedesco, playing acoustic guitar!
JAN: And over on the left side, playing all the weird instruments. He's really a weird guy to know, he's a real swingin' guy... Gary Coleman. How do you like that?
JAN: And formerly from the Shindig! show... The guy who made Shindig!, really... It wasn't the--
DEAN: Who's she?
JAN: [?] producer. What was his name? I don't know. And it wasn't the acts, it was the guy who did all the music. Ray Pohlman, playing bass guitar
JAN: And last... and least, I mean, last but not least... (chuckles) Hal-- (cut) Hal Blaine, the world's most famous drummer!
DEAN: Now, what were we going to do?
JAN: Oh, yes
DEAN: Uh. Oh
JAN: Dean's gonna sing his version of "Michelle". All the girls named Roberta
(cut)
JAN: Blaine, the world's most famous drummer!
DEAN: Now, what were we going to do?
JAN: Oh, yes
DEAN: Uh. Oh
JAN: Dean's gonna sing his version of "Michelle"
(Band starts "Michelle", but breaks down during intro.)

[Part III: Michelle]
[Intro]
1, 2
1, 2, 3, 4
[Chorus]
Michelle, ma belle
These are words that go together well
My Michelle
Michelle, ma belle
Sont des mots qui vont tres bien ensemble
Tres bien ensemble

[Verse 1]
I love you, I love you, I love you
That's all I want to say
Until I find a way
I'll say the only words I know that you understand

[Chorus]
Michelle, ma belle
Sont des mots qui vont tres bien ensemble
Tres ben ensemble

[Verse 2]
I need to, I need to, I need to
I need to make you see
Oh, what you mean to me
Until I do, I'm hoping you will know what I mean
I love you
[Verse 3]
I want you, I want you, I want you
I think you know by now
I'll get to you somehow
Until I do, I'm telling you so you understand

[Chorus]
Michelle, ma belle
Sont des mots qui vont tres bien ensemble
Tres bien ensemble

[Outro]
And I'll say the only words I know that you understand, my Michelle
My Michelle

[Part IV: Whistling Dixie]
[Segue]
(Audience cheers and (overdubbed) boos.)
JAN: Just ain't whistling Dixie
(Jan whistles "Dixie".)

[Chorus]
I wish I were in Dixie
Away, away
In Dixieland [?] in Dixie
Away, away, away down South to Dixie
Away, away, away down South to Dixie