[Intro]
Girl: Gee, Sebastian. I wanna go to UCLA!
Cody: What? Is you crazy girl? Why would you wanna do that when everything is right here at USC?

[Verse 1]
The ivy is always greener
On somebody else's wall
You dream about UCLA
But that is a stupid call
Just look at this awesome campus
And check out our football score
We beat them in every contest
What more are you looking for?

[Chorus 1]
At USC
At USC
Baseball's best hitter, actor John Ritter
From Three's Company
Up in Westwood, they walk for weeks
All of their dorms on mountain peaks
While we're returnin' our time for learnin'
At USC

[Verse 2]
Down here we got Ricky Bobby
And Reggie, who rules the sport
We've also got old Judge Wapner
That dude from The People's Court
We've also got Stormin' Norman
And that dude works for Uncle Sam
We've also got famous cowboys
And cute Richie Cunningham
[Chorus 2]
At USC
At USC
We've got the creator of Luke and Darth Vader
And Kenobi
We've got this guy from ABC
Made a talk show, Kathie Lee
Life here is heaven with Traveler VII
At USC
At USC
Great tech, yes very [?], House on the Prairie
It's on TV
Out in the sun, we cheer all day
When our tough Trojans start to play
We've got a spirit, you've gotta hear it
At USC

[Bridge]
This guy, he ain't shy, from Magnum P.I
This Moonlighting girl, her hair has a curl
This gal I admire from St. Elmo's Fire
They all went to USC
It's home to the stars, this dog chases cars
Our mascot of course is this big ol' horse
There's also this dude, makes Mexican food
It's great at 3 a.m.​
[Chorus 3]
At USC
At USC
Check out this fellow Cardinal in yellow
He looks like me
Each of these Bruins quakes in fear
As we impale them with our spears
We win the game here, always the same here
At USC

[Chorus 4]
At USC
At USC
Great education, plus Trojan Nation
Just right for me
What do they got? A lousy bear
We've got this awesome hat to wear
Each little frat here knows where it's at here
At USC
Each little dean here, down with the scene here
At USC
Each little one here likes to have fun here
That's why we rule here, let's go to school here
Out in the west here, our school's the best here
At USC!