[ALAMEDA SLIM]
Now listen up!

There are crooks in this here West
Who have claimed to be the best
And think they wrote the book on how to rustle
Well, as good as they may be
Not a one's as good as me
An' I barely have to move a single muscle!
They call me mean, boys
Depraved and nasty too
And they ain't seen, boys
The cruelest thing I do

You see, I yodel-adle-eedle-idle-odle!
The sweetest way of rustlin' yet devised!
'Cause when I yodel-adle-eedle-idle-odle!
Why, looky how them cows git hypnotized!

[BILL]
He don't prod

[PHIL]
He don't yell

[GIL]
Still he drives them dogies well
[THE WILLIE BROTHERS]
Which ain't easy when your chaps are labeled XXXXL!

[ALAMEDA SLIM]
Yes, if yer lookin' from a bovine point of view
I sure can yodel-adle-eedle-idle
Yodel-adle-eedle-idle
Yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo!

(spoken)
Here we go, boys!
Five thousand cattle in the side pocket!

*Yodels "William Tell Overture, "Yankee Doodle" & "Beethoven's Ode to Joy"*

Yes, I can yodel-adle-eedle-odle

[MALE Chorus]
A sound them cattle truly take to heart!

[ALAMEDA SLIM]
Yeah, I can yodel-adle-eedle-idle-odle!
An' smack my big ol' rump if that ain't art!

[BILL]
He don't rope
[PHIL]
Not a chance!

[GIL]
He just puts 'em in a trance!

[THE WILLIE BROTHERS]
He's a pioneer Pied Piper in ten-gallon underpants!

[ALAMEDA]
Yep! I'm the real rip-roarin' deal to those who moo!
They'd sue my dodle-adle-eedle-idle, dodle-adle-eedle-idle
I got the cattle out the ol' wazoo!
'Cause I can yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo!
Yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo!