Kesha
Warrior Interrogation
Interrogator: Let's start with the hard ones first, shall we?
Ke$ha: What do you wanna know?
Interrogator: I want to know your full name.
Ke$ha: Ke$ha. With a dollar sign.
Interrogator: What's your date of birth?
Ke$ha: March 1st, 1987.
Interrogator: Is it true your mother was an alien?
Ke$ha: How do you know that?
Interrogator: Just answer the question.
Ke$ha: Yes.
Interrogator: What about your father? What was he? Alice Cooper?
Ke$ha: Kind of.
Interrogator: Is it true that your song "Gold Trans Am" is about you hoo-ha?
Ke$ha: Yes, that is true. I admit fully that it is. Cause my vagina's gold. It's glittery too. It smells like candy.
Interrogator: So if I asked the question, "Do you eat glitter on a daily basis?" What's your answer to that one?
Ke$ha: I do. That's fair. That's fine. I do.
Interrogator: Mr. Peep$. Oh yeah. Your cat. When did you last speak to it?
Ke$ha: Everyday. All day long. And I'm psychic, and I can talk to him in my mind, every second.
Interrogator: What's he doing right now?
Ke$ha: Right now, he's climbing up a tree. He thinks you're a big asshole.
Interrogator: Have you got codenames for you male conquests?
Ke$ha: Yeah.
Interrogator: Give me an example.
Ke$ha: Captain Dick'n'balls. DJ Fucktard.
Interrogator: Do you know a Baby Spoon?
Ke$ha: Oh... Why are you bringing him into this? Why are you bringing the Baby Spoon here?
Interrogator: Do you know him?
Ke$ha: Yeah! He liked to spoon. So, he wanted to be the baby spoon. And I thought that was super lame.
Interrogator: You've got a track called "Past Lives" on your new album. Oh yeah. And it's about Elvis Presley. Is that right.
Ke$ha: No, it's about Liberace. Cause apparently I was Liberace in my past life. I really like capes.
Interrogator: He's the guy with the glitter, isn't he?
Ke$ha: Yeah.
Interrogator: Do you speak Dinosaur?
Ke$ha: I do. Do you wanna hear? Do you speak Dinosaur?
Interrogator: No, I don't speak Dinosaur. Thank you.
Ke$ha: *speaks in Dinosaur*
Interrogator: Are you talking to ghosts was we speak?
Ke$ha: No, I'm talking in Dinosaur! I'm talking to Mr. Peeps in Dinosaur. It's our secret language.
Interrogator: Are you able to--
Ke$ha: *speaks in Dinosaur*
Interrogator: So, let's talk tattoos. Shall we?
Ke$ha: I got some tattoos.
Interrogator: Tattoos. Ah! You got more than one?
Ke$ha: Uh-huh.
Interrogator: Tell me about the other ones.
Ke$ha: They're all really terrible. *shows inner lip tattoo* I got that one in prison.
That one was supposed to be a feather, but it looks like a leaf.
That one says, "Yeah!"
Interrogator: Is it true you got one on your queen mum?
Ke$ha: What?
Interrogator: Your queen mum.
Ke$ha: My mom?
Interrogator: Cockney? Queen mum? Bum?
Ke$ha: Oh, my butt! No. *laughs* I'm wasted. No I'm not. *speaks Dinosaur*
Interrogator: Do you prefer to record naked?
Ke$ha: Yeah.
*Die Young Chorus*