[Intro]
Oh, you can't be serious, man
You cannot be serious!
That ball was on the line!
The chalk flew up!
It was clearly hit
How can you possibly call that out?!
How many have you missed?!

[Verse 1]
Take that smug little smile off your adorable fucking face
The fame's got into your head, man
What do you think?
You can just come in here and run the place?
Counter to what you think, pal
This ain't Elmo's World
You don't know any rappers, man
And you damn sure can't get no girls

[Pre-Chorus]
La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la, Elmo's song sucks, you bubble bathing rubber ducky bitch
You're a has-been, it was luck
Never heard of a dentist?
You little red menace?
Shut your pie hole!
I'm tryna play tennis!
[Chorus]
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
Go swallow a pint of wasabi!
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
I'm not tickled one bit Kemosabee
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)

[Post Chorus]
That is a penalty, sir
I'm here for the people's protection
This is your last warning, next time, it's the automatic ejection
(You cannot be serious! Oh!)

[Verse 2]
Oh you think that's funny, buddy?
Hope you had a real good laugh
Even though, you're a foot and half tall
Still gonna break your ass in half
You having a good time up there, yeah?
Giggling, gallivanting
While, I'm down here, Isner Mahut'ed, man I'm panting
I'd rather stick needles in my ears
Than hear that ghetto falsetto
The whole third person shtick is so passé
You ain't as cool as the Geico Gecko
I repeat, I repeat
This ain't Sesame Street
Hey ref! How do they let riffraff like this get box seats?!
[Chorus]
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
Go swallow a pint of wasabi!
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
I'm not tickled one bit Kemosabee
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)
Fuck you Elmo! (Fuck you Elmo!)

[Outro]
That's it!
You're out of here!
(How many have you missed?)