I'll be killing you this Christmas
'Tis the season you must die
Though there's no way that you'll miss this
A bushmaster's on my wish list
My right to bear arms you cannot deny

I'll be shooting folks this Christmas
But there's no need to be worried or alarmed
What's wrong with a hand gun
When everybody has one
Which is why we all need to be armed

That's right I'm armed and dangerous this Christmas
It's an oxymoron I know how to sell
But you won't pry fingers from it
My precious second amendment
Guarantees a clip that holds a hundred rounds

Santa's packing heat this Christmas
In your school, your church, and your department store
The evidence is hazy
Background checks can't kill a crazy
We need firepower that can win a war

And so I'll be wasting you this Christmas
And the NRA they lobby, so it's so
I love our great nation
The real world is my Playstation
I'll blow you away beneath the mistletoe
I'll be killing you this Christmas