[Hook]
Gas in the tank but the car won't drive
The car won't drive?
No the car won't drive
Air in the tire but the bike won't ride
The bike won't ride?
No the bike won't ride
Swim trunks on the line but the shorts won't dry
The shorts won't dry?
No the short's won't dry
Water on the grill but the flame burns higher
The flame gets higher?
Yeah this shits still fire

[Verse 1]
The marriage from the grill makes the grass look nuts
I can't see the girl with the massive butt
So I move my deck chair, dry my wet hair
Everybody's looking 'cause she's hotter than jet flares
But I got a chance way better than most guys
'Cause I stay loose, not pressed like Levi's
And these guys look stuffed up like pitas
And freeze up like ice cubes in the freezer
So I'm going to chill for a minute
Sip a little drank 'till the cup gets finished
Have some hors d'oeuvre, maybe artichoke and spinach dip
Scoop it up with pumpernickel bread, it's delicious
I know the way the game goes down
They show the same attention like most clowns
I'd rather boast on the low down, than to walk around hurt
Like a jerk with a dumb frown
This way if she's not having it, I can just fall back go grab another chick
And that's it, another day another dame
No harm, no foul. That's the way I play the game

[Hook]
Gas in the tank but the car won't drive
The car won't drive?
No the car won't drive
Air in the tire but the bike won't ride
The bike won't ride?
No the bike won't ride
Swim trunks on the line but the shorts won't dry
The shorts won't dry?
No the short's won't dry
Water on the grill but the flame burns higher
The flame gets higher?
Yeah this shits still fire

[Bridge]
Well I know you think you know what you want
But baby I'm a dunce
I only talk this shit to my friends
My game is just pretend
So don't get caught up with me 'cause I'm dumb
I'm really just a bum
Even your girls know that I'm a schmuck
I guess that leaves us stuck

[Verse 2]
You got a two piece on 'cause the heat wave popped off
Serve my food cold, save the fucking hot sauce
Is this mayonnaise, bitch? This is not sauce
Give me the sub sauce, and take the fucking top off
This is what you get for staying with an asshole
Undeveloped like a premature tadpole
I ran your panties up a god damn flag pole
Around the third girl, come on I got to brag, yo
Fall back if you don't want to deal with my shit
Guys walk by and stare, look at my chick
I don't care if they talk shit and comment
Jealousy's a bad look and chivalry is nonsense
We finished drinking at the local corner jock pub
We saw Tool play and they fucking rocked us
It's getting late, babe, look at the clock
Back to my friends house - sex in the hot tub!

[Bridge]
Well I know you think you know what you want
But baby I'm a dunce
I only talk this shit to my friends
My game is just pretend
So don't get caught up with me 'cause I'm dumb
I'm really just a bum
Even your girls know that I'm a schmuck
I guess that leaves us stuck

[Hook]
Gas in the tank but the car won't drive
The car won't drive?
No the car won't drive
Air in the tire but the bike won't ride
The bike won't ride?
No the bike won't ride
Swim trunks on the line but the shorts won't dry
The shorts won't dry?
No the short's won't dry
Water on the grill but the flame burns higher
The flame gets higher?
Yeah this shits still fire