[Verse]
When smoke pours from my mouth
I feel like a dragon
Or like Gandalf, blowing magic rings
With his best friend, Bilbo Baggins
Or James Dean in his white t-shirt
With smokes rolled in his sleeve
Or my granddad puffin' in those Polaroids
Man, he looked just like me

But cooler than me 'cause he was smokin'
But he's dead
And so is James Dean
And sure, James Dean died in a car wreck
But I'm sure a cigarette caused the accident
And Bilbo and Gandalf never existed
But if they did, now they would be dead

[Bridge]
But dragons, they do exist
And they have special lungs that resist
The carcinogenic effect of smoke
But I don't
So I'm not gonna smoke

[Outro/Chorus]
'Cause I'm a person, not a dragon
Rest in peace, Bilbo Baggins
'Cause I'm a person, not a dragon
Rest in peace, Bilbo Baggins
'Cause I'm a person, not a dragon
Rest in peace, Bilbo Baggins
'Cause I'm a person, not a dragon
Rest in peace, Bilbo Baggins