("...What's this? Oh. This could be fun... ZE!")

Reimu Hakurei!
The shrine maiden of paradise, they say
But izzit more like hell or paradise
When my shrine’s full of youkai playin’ nice? (It’s uncanny!)

Reimu Hakurei!
The shrine maiden of mystery, they say
But, I mean, even if my hit-box shrinks
My shot-power, it always really stinks. (Why do players pick me?)

("Now that's a mystery, ain't it?")

Look at red and white (ze)
Maybe half as cool as black and white (ze)
"Pure and right"— heh!
And I’ll shootcha if yer in the way!

Maybe someday
If I just gеt off my lazy butt (ze)
There’d bе some way
I could find another job to pay the bills…

The lock on my collection box (ze) might as well be called a “fantasy seal”: (get it?)
In my dreams I’m rich— but I’m really freakin’ broke, for real
I’ve got no consideration for how my good friend might feel
Who desperately needs some more interestin’ stuff to steal. (By which I mean, borrow!)
Reimu Hakurei!
The shrine maiden of—

(("Marisa..."))
("Oi, Reimu, there ya are! Uhh wait a sec, I was just—")
(("FANTASY SEAL!!"))
("Gah! MASTER SPARK!!")
...
("Jeez, yer so cold Reimu. Ya oughta lighten up. We'll start with yer pockets, ze...")
(("Hmph. Please stick to writing spell books, and not other people's theme songs."))