She said "There's something in the woodshed
And I can hear it breathing -
It's such an eerie feeling, darling."
He said "There's nothing in the woodshed -
It's your imagination
End of the conversation, darling."

Something in his heart told him to come clean
He was not who he claimed to be
Something in his genes told him to pretend
'Twas something for the weekend

But she said "There's something in the woodshed
I know because I saw it
I can't simply ignore it, darling."
So he said "Now baby, don't be stupid
Get this into your sweet head
There ain't nothing in the woodshed (except maybe some wood)."

Something in his heart told him to come clean
He was not who he claimed to be
Something in his jeans told him to pretend
'Twas something for the weekend

"I'll go all the way with you, if you'll only do the same for me — go and see
If it's nothing like you say, then you can have your wicked way with me"
He went down to the woodshed
They came down hard on his head
Gagged and bound and left for dead
When he woke she was gone with his car and all of his money